Families Should Be Families

For families in Leeds, looking after their elderly relatives is an act of love.

We buy their groceries, cook meals for them, take a quick trip to say hello, and check on their safety and happiness. But the problem is that a succession of small actions can add up to a larger one. For instance, if their health care is not what it should be, or if they require personal care.

A son or daughter can find themselves no longer able to play the role of a loving family member, but instead a part-time or full-time carer.

At our agency, Right at Home – Leeds East, Roundhay to Rothwell, we have encountered many such clients. For whatever reason, we find that families usually leave it too long before finally seeking assistance.

Waiting too long.

“I was so busy looking after my mum that I stopped being her daughter. I could sense a distance increasing between us. I had such lovely memories of spending time with my mum, and those memories were gradually being swapped with memories of looking after my mum and doing personal things for my mum that I didn’t always find easy to do. I wanted to get back to the days of sitting with my mum and having a cup of tea together. Now I finally can.” Our client's daughter told us.

It is very common for us to encounter families who have been “managing” for longer than perhaps they should have. Families are exhausted and anxious. Families struggle with guilt if they don’t take care of their loved one themselves.

Some families have sibling rivalry to the point where one sibling is doing too much, and the other is doing too little. Even if they love their parents or grandparents very much, they struggle to fit their care into their own busy schedules.

In our experience, there are three conversations families must have regarding the future loving care of a loved one:

• Identifying if the family requires support. Once it is decided, yes.
• Then to have a conversation with mum or dad, and explain why professional assistance is needed, and finally,
• How to find a reliable, caring and trustworthy home care agency to look after mum and dad in a safe and person-centred manner.

Starting a Conversation with mum or dad.

We recognise that it is a sensitive subject to bring up. In many cases, the elderly can be quite independent and may be concerned about having people come to their home. Nonetheless, it is crucial to bring it up gently.

Some of the simplest methods to begin such a conversation include:

• Emphasise well-being versus weakness. Discuss how extra support will help them to continue living independently and feeling safe in their home.
• Keep it small. Suggest a few hours of companionship and/or help in and around the home. It is a wonderful way to begin developing trust.
• Make it a family decision. Your loved one should have a say in who is allowed to enter their home and at what time.
• Reassure them. Let them know that carers are professionals. Also, let them know you’re present to support them, not to take control.

In most cases, when we are brought in, families wonder why they did not act sooner after the first step is accomplished. The sense of relief and belonging that is regained can be very intense.

Seeking assistance.

A good care provider will listen carefully to your needs and develop a plan that addresses them. At Right at Home – Leeds East, we offer a free, no-obligation care consultation to talk with your mum or dad and the family, so we can determine precisely what is needed to help your mum or dad live comfortably at home. This is usually done with a cup of tea to facilitate communication.

Meet the Faces Behind the Care

At Right at Home – Leeds East, we recognise that training and consistency count, but it is people who bring care to life. When we recruit employees, we are very picky.

We pay our CareGivers well, and we always take our time in choosing who we employ, not only for their experience and skills, but more importantly for qualities we can’t train for, such as kindness and empathy. 

“Looking after your family, like family.” - The Difference Professional Carers Make 

The services offered by our team at Right at Home are wide-ranging. These include anything from personal care, medication administration, dementia care, stoma care, and companionship. But it is our continued care that makes the real difference.

This means we ensure there is a regular team of carers for your loved one. This is usually 1-2 consistent carers with 1-2 floaters. This allows everyone to have the chance to develop a relationship. Looking after your loved one is not just a list of tasks to be done. 

We always try to make sure there is enough time for our CareGivers to sit with your loved one, have a cup of tea, and offer companionship. Sometimes, a loved one may only get to see their CareGiver all day, and that companionship and human touch become critical. 

All the more so as it is also during sit-downs with your loved one that our team can check whether mum or dad has any health complaints which warrant attention in a health care setting, and over a period of time, as we get to know each other, we can report back to the family and medical team on their cognitive health.

If any of these have resonated with you and you would like to have a chat to explore what we can offer and how to have conversations with your family and loved ones, give us a call. 

Contact us on 0113-833-1950 or send an email too: LeedsEast@rightathome.co.uk